Reasons My Family Can't Be A Reality Show

1. The "Strictest Parents" said not to, and honestly, I'm kind of afraid of them.

2. I'm nervous that I'll be caught on camera picking a wedgie (c'mon, you all do it sometimes. I've seen you).

3. I like to brush my teeth in private because I'm a bit of a messy spitter.

4. The only producers who are interested in us are from National Geographic, and their show is called "Barely Domesticated". It doesn't sound promising.

5. We gossip a lot at the dinner table, so we'd probably lose all our friends.

6. The most interesting thing that's happened to us lately is when my son got his nose stuck in a water bottle.

My So-Called Christmas Card

A Quick Rundown of 2010:

D-Dawg (16) is "driving" his mom and dad to tears. Tears of joy, that is, since he's running all their errands for them. TLC (13) has recently taken a part-time job as a stalker, or at least that's what we have to assume after seeing his photo above. Bananalyn (9) is looking forward to being in double digits soon, and has subscribed to AARP magazine in preparation for the big day. AJ, aka Squinty, (5) begins every day with the same phrase: "Can I invite a friend over?", and ends every day with the equally endearing phrase, "I need a drink." We're planning an intervention. And little Tator Tot (7 weeks) thinks Christmas is totally over-commercialized and refuses to participate.

JByrd recently received a mug for his birthday that says "World's Best Dad". He was surprised because he didn't know the voting had ended, but he wants all you other dads to know that he totally respects you, even though you didn't win. (losers). And I recently saved 15% or more on my car insurance, so I'm feeling pretty good about that.

Merry Christmas!

My little tator tot

Well, it's been 5 years since I've had a new baby in the house. Of course, I knew before she was born that I had gotten very used to sleeping through the night, to eating dinner without being interrupted by a squalling baby, and to quiet Sundays where the older kids read and the younger ones play together (semi) nicely. I wondered how I was going to handle my plunge back into babydom, the land of ultimate (if forced) unselfishness. Here is how it has been:

Every breath she has taken, every minute that's gone by, every late night feeding and diaper changed - I want it all back, I desperately want it all to quit flying away so fast. Not a day has gone by that I haven't wished I was in the hospital again, that she had just been born, and that I could have every minute of her life to live over again. That's how much I love her.

Important Update

It was I. I slept on the couch. It's so unfair, I never get to be the one who's worse off.

Wait, did I really just say that?

Arm's Length

So, hubby just got done with yet another medical appointment (he should host Mystery Diagnosis with all the stuff he's got going on with his bod). When I picked him up from the appointment, there were several ominous signs that something was desperately wrong:

1. Instead of getting in the front passenger seat, where I had a pretzel and an Orange Julius waiting for him, he climbed all the way back to the third row. Please note: Hubby doesn't climb. Ever. Although once when he mixed two un-mixable medications he did hurdle the couch. And I have it on video.

2. He told me one of us would have to sleep on the couch tonight. Hmmm, guy with bad back or girl who's 6 months prego. You be the judge.

3. I winked at him in the mirror and he told me not to get fresh, that I wouldn't be seeing even so much as a hug from him anytime soon.

Impending divorce? Nope, radioactive husband. It's true. The doc told him that he was radioactive from the test he just had and that, since I'm pregnant, he has to stay at least an arm's length away from me for at least 24 hours. How big of a dose did they give him, geez!

Shameless Plug

Next time you are driving by your local Deseret Book, check out the July/August issue of LDS Living magazine. Page 36, "Fostering Love" by Lecia Crider, better be the first thing you read!

Changing

It feels good to be able to honestly say,


"I feel like I've really grown a lot this past month."


And it's true.


I have.


Sorry, no photos though.

Say Something!

I searched for blog postings with the title "Nothing to Say", and then waited patiently for my slow computer to pull up several hundred results. After sampling a small handful of them, I would say their titles were completely accurate.

Can you say, "Nothing to do"?

Waiting

I hate delays. Particularly when I am sitting in front of the computer. If a screen doesn't pop up in the time it takes me to breathe twice, I am eye-poppingly frustrated.

That can sometimes make working remotely a little tricky. None of my software responds as quickly remotely as it does when we are face-to-icon, so to speak. One program (stop) in particular is painfully slow. I am doing nothing more complicated than garden variety data entry when I am in this program, but each time I save an entry and try to move on to the next one, the program spends a great deal of time thinking about whether it should let me move on or not. Right now it's driving me so insane that I decided to write this blog in between entries. This will give you an idea of either A) how brilliantly fast I think and type, or B) how stupendously slow the program is. (stop)

Other things I hate waiting for:
A commercial break so I can get hubby's attention. This can be a long wait if you're married to a channel-surfer!

Dinner to be done when I waited to start it until I was already starving.

Test results from (stop) a doctor.

Pimples to fade.

Of course, when the delay is my choice, the waiting is a little less difficult. For example, my cluttered closet has needed my attention for lo these many years, but I'm content to wait a little longer to tackle it, on account of not knowing what to do with all hubby's stuff that's in there too. That seems reas (stop) onable to me.

And, due to the piles of bad karma I've stored up over the years, I have a high school reunion scheduled for a day when I will be approximately 38 weeks pregnant. I think I might hold off on that, too! Nonstop "so, what have you been up to?" conversations can definitely wait.

Thanks for making my data entry go by a little (stop) faster for me. Now that I'm done posting I plan to fill the gaps between entries by eating gummy bears.

Oh, Man, It's Over

It's over! I'm 18 weeks and FINALLY feeling better. I still have a little nausea, but just like a little car sickness, nothing like what I've been dealing with.

The kids just got out of school for the summer, so my return to health came just in time. I love having my kiddies around during the summer, and it always goes by too fast. This summer we are playing it cheap and easy. Here's how the summer works at Casa Currant Pie:

Gotta have a chore chart of course! It's a self-directed reward system, so I don't have to spend all summer nagging. If your chores are done by noon you get 3 points. If they are done correctly you get 2 more points. Add 2 extra points if your room is clean and your bed is made. They are working together to reach 900 points (which should happen towards the end of July) and then we all get to go to Big Surf water park for the day! This worked like a charm for us last year, and the payoff was loads of fun.

Every week there is a designated Laundry Captain, Chef, and Pool Boy/Girl. The kids learn how to cook and do laundry, etc., which is good for them, although the results are sometimes a little iffy!

Monday is library day, with a stop off a Sonic for half price slushies on the way home.

Tuesday is Peter Piper Pizza day. Dad works at the corporate office and we get comps, so hooray for free pizza and video games.

Wednesday is $1 movie day at Cinemark.

The rest of the week is for chillin' and swimmin' at home, assuming we can keep our pool blue and a good supply of popsicles on hand. 

In between I visit the office a couple times a week and do the rest of my work from home. Have I ever mentioned how grateful I am for my job? I worked outside the home for about 15 years, and I feel so blessed now that my current company allows me to work most of my hours at home. It has truly changed my life and brought me so much joy.

Have a happy summer!